Sunday, July 29, 2012

Attitudes of the self Righteous Sociopath

This article and list was something I printed out in around 2005.  It helped me see what I was dealing with in a relationship.  It escalated to downright horror, as after several years of dealing with this nightmare and trying to end it over and over again, only to see (what I now know was all feigned emotions of love, crocodile tears and temporary "honeymoon" behaviors when I gave in and took him back)   Some of it I don't understand, but most I do.  Taking him back by his super powers to convince you of his sincerity, his misunderstanding of his own behavior, willingness to do whatever it took to make it work with us, as he knew we were perfect together and he made so many  mistakes he wanted to fix and make sure would never happen again.  

The more I let him back in, the more intense his emotions of love and desire to work it out ( ha, it was NEVER the truth, quite the opposite) but so, too, were the intensities of his outrageous behaviors and treatment towards me.  There are serious parallels to what's going on with this guy, the so called "President" who has been reported candidly, by those who know him well, and some by their desire to remain anonymous, to have almost all the traits here in this list of warning signs intended for women to protect themselves from abusive, possibly deadly relationships with sociopathic, even psychopathic men. 

GET OUT it says.  You can only write off the losses he incurred and move away, get out of it, and know that only future escalated wrongdoings will be committed by him against you.    This advice couldn't be further from the best and only choice one has to protect themselves.  The best would have been to see the red flags in the first place and to have gone with instincts instead of ignoring them.  You're less likely to suffer from further pain and regret for making that difficult decision, but you will, for sure, regret ignoring your gut feelings, staying in denial, and experiencing what might be your ability to survive the wrath of the sociopath.  

I was almost killed in an unprecedented snap, an uncontrolled fit of violent rage he finally let loose on me when I didn't ever think that could or would be a possibility.  ANYTHING is with these guys.  He methodically, like a programmed robot came after me, grabbed me and lifted me from behind, and threw me down on the bed, on top of me, twisting my arms behind my back while straddling me and restraining my arms with the strong grip of his inner thighs, while forcing a pillow over my head cutting off my oxygen supply.  

It was clearly the most horrifying experience ever, and he has no idea how close he was to killing me, and for a while I convinced myself he was trying to scare me, not actually end my life, but I realized that was a form of denial.   He was way too close to accomplishing that goal before I was able to fight with all I had.. At first  I was afraid to fight him too hard to create more rage and aggressiveness, but then Laci Peterson came to mind, like an angel above, it was as if she said the last thing you'll expect is that you're being viciously attacked, and that you will be killed by the man who said it was you and only you he'd ever love.   RIP Laci ~ your spirit saved my life. 

I hope this country comes out of denial as I did, realizes we're being attacked by the man who is supposed to love the United States with all his heart, and NOT divide the people, create hardships, mental anguish, and hopelessness of where this country is going..This doesn't cover it all, and this is just his START.  Voting for this man will be the most regrettable action any American can make, our lives are at stake.  

"He is what he is, and you can't fix or change him.  Count your losses and move on before you lose
EVERYTHING and EVERYONE important in your life"  

  • Self-centered. His needs are paramount
  • .No remorse for mistakes, misdeeds, or causing serious harm
  • Unreliable - Undependable

  • Does not care about the consequences of his actions

  • Projects his faults and negative thoughts onto others.
  • High Blaming behavior - It is never his fault.
  • Little, if any, Conscience
  • Insensitive to needs and feelings of others.
  • Has a good front (personae) to impress, gain trust and exploit others
  • Low stress tolerance Easy to anger and go off in a rage.
  • People are objects to fulfill his needs desires goals,  subjects of his manipulation.
  • Rationalizes easy.  Twists conversation to his gain at other's expense.  If trapped, keeps talking, changes the subject, or gets angry.
  • Pathological Lying.  Lies easily with no apparent discomfort.  Well rehearsed, can believe his own lies by saying them over and over.
  • Tremendous need to control situations, conversations, and others.
  • No real values.  Shifts with each situation.
  • Often perceived as caring and understanding and a good man.  Those are feigned as a front for manipulation
  • Angry, unpredictable brooding moods.
  • Uses sex to control.
  • Does not share ideas, feelings, emotions - but dictates them.
  • Conversation controller. Must have the first and last word.
  • Is very slow to forgive others. Hangs on to resentment.  Easily offended.
  • Hides things: money, friends, activities. Sometimes has a secret life.
  • Likes annoying others. Enjoys creating chaos, disrupt, and divide for no reason.
  • Moody, switches from nice guy to anger without much provocation.
  • Repeatedly fails to honor financial obligations
  • Seldom expresses appreciation.
  • Grandiose.  Convinced he knows more than others.  He is always correct.
  • Lacks the ability to see how he comes across to others.
  • Defensive and rigorously denies and blames others when confronted with his behavior.

For You, and Your DenialFor You, and Your Denial (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

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